The following are a handful flicks due out this summer. They are accompanied by 'truthful taglines,' slogans that, for better or worse, best describe / sell the movie. 

APRIL:

The Last Song

For those that enjoy Miley Cyrus and/or Hate Greg Kinnear

Kenny Chesney: Summer in 3D

Did the Money You Were Going to Spend on Concert Tickets Go to Child Support?

Clash of the Titans

Do You Want to Disappoint Sam Worthington?

Date Night

NBC Really Needs this One

Kick-Ass

We Got Cage.

Oceans

Take Your Children. Or Your Dealer

The Back-Up Plan

 Knocked U for Hispanics

Death At a Funeral

A Tyler Perry Movie Without Tyler Perry

A Nightmare on Elm Street

Blood and Boobs

Furry Vengence

Your Kid Like Brendan Fraser. Trust Us.

MAY:

Iron Man 2

J in Your P

Babies

He Made You See Iron Man 2

Robin Hood

His Name is Robin Hood, Commander of the Armies of the Sherwood, General of the Merry Men, Loyal Servant to the True Emperor, Richard the Lion Heart. Son to a Murdered Father, Boyfriend to a Murdered Girlfriend. And He Will Have His Vengeance, in this Life or the Next.

Shrek Forever After

Alternate Title: How to Make 400 Million Without Even Trying

MacGruber

More Blues Brothers than Ladies Man. Nah, Just Kidding. Closer to Ladies Man.

Sex and City 2

Men. Who Needs Em?

Letters to Juliet

Too Young for Sex and the City 2?

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

When Has a Movie Adaptation of a Video Game Disappointed You? Wait, Don’t Answer That.

JUNE:

Get Him To The Greek

Remember those Couple Times You Laughed During Forgetting Sarah Marshall? We Made a Movie Out of It.

Toy Story 3

We Can’t Miss

Jonah Hex

Let’s Give This Josh Brolin a Shot. Eh?

Grown Ups

If you Combine Sandler’s, Chris Rock’s, David Spade’s, and Rob Schneider’s Quarter Tanks, You Get One Full Tank.

The Karate Kid

Smith’s Kid Wacks Disipwin No Mo

The A-Team

Starting to Think that the Whole ‘Let’s Build an Action Franchise Around the Bad Guy from Wedding Crashers and Liam Neeson’ Might Have Been a Bad Idea.

JULY:

Knight And Day

Like Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Only Crazier and Slightly Less Sexy

Twilight: The Eclipse

Joey Called You Fat.

The Last Airbender

Help Hammer Home the Nail In Shyamalan’s Coffin

Predators

Yep. That’s Adrian Brody.

The Sorcerer’s Apprentice

Harry Potter: The Nic Cage Experience

Salt

Mrs. Smith

AUGUST:

Step Up: 3-D

The Only Thing the First Two Movies Were Missing Was a Third Dimension

The Expendables

So Much HGH

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

Cera’s Shtick vs. Your Patience

Eat, Pray, Love

Pay, Weep, Tell Your Friends

Nanny McPhee and the Big Bang

We Made This So You’d Remember their Was a First One

Takers

The Ultimate Starring Contest – Hayden Christensen Vs. Paul Walker

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